| When You Say Nothing At All
by Tony WhitakerJust before midnight I awake
As I have done so many times before
Hoping for that sweet sleep to sweep me away to some distant shore
As I hear her whispered breathing my mind is whisked away
I suddenly come to realize, this simple thing, she satisfies each day
How my lovely wife, fills well, the boredom of the voids
Voids when I am sick and stuck in bed for days
Voids of walking crowded aisles as she hurries for my sake
Voids in driving down some road when there is nothing left to say
Voids in just watching people as we sit at some sidewalk café
Voids when her love lies sleeping, awaiting another day
And I will always love those empty spaces, she fills with just her ways |
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when heaven breaks
by Lindsay Sanders
it’s not that the world
splitting in half
makes no sound,
but real love is violent
relentlessly clutching,
pulling, ripping lies out of truth.
light breaks through in streams,
oh the fate of darkness
in the presence of love-
just as dust under
a raging waterfall.
“wake up, wake up!”
love cries-
“truth is at your side
and life is the ocean
you’re sinking in.”
it’s not that the heart
splitting in half
makes no sound.
but real love is violent
relentlessly clutching,
pulling, ripping lies
out of truth.
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| I just realized that either I've been living in a box or I've just been amazingly self-centered.
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| Yes, Heaven is thine; but this
Is a world of sweets and sours;
Our flowers are merely ‑ flowers,
And the shadow of thy perfect bliss
Is the sunshine of ours.
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I've been here for a few days over a month and it's funny quantifying the time I spent here because it doesn't seem like I can. It feels like I've been here for so long--like months--and all the new things I've absorbed and adjusted to makes the experience a whole lot denser in value. I came here, subconsciously holding back tears, expecting lonliness, homesickness, awkwardness, and perhaps a bit of emptiness but I found none of that. The only tears I had to hold back were the ones triggered by my family wishing me love as they dropped me off. And then...adjustment. Adaptation. God is really good to me because I didn't have any real transition issues. The workload here is adding up, that's true, but I think I was prepared for it.
There is one thing that is hard--I didn't think it would be so--and that is keeping in step in faith. College is filled with so much, so much good and some bad that can easily eat away at your time like you do to your chicken leg of life. College and the circumstances become the black cat that God gave you and weeks may go by until you hear a voice in the back saying, "Have you forgotten me?" And then gentle nudges back into your senses. Thank God He is faithful because most definitely, if He wasn't, we're dead meat.
This is something I have learned again and again: Faith is a choice. Sure, back at home you may have parents or other fellow church members encouraging, reminding, or maybe even forcing you to attend service and events but really, it is all a choice. In this place where I no longer have those blessed reminders and obligations, faith is a choice, a step in response to Him who is always waiting for you to make it. So don't be misled; attending church and youthgroup and closing prayers doesn't mean anything to Him. He looks past everything and straight to the heart of intentions. Why do you go to service? Why do you highlight things that mean nothing to you in your Bible? Faith is no facade, no coverup for something different. Don't let yourself become a joke.
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| It's a little hard to admit but this has already started becoming 'home.'
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